It took me a while to get here….this blogging thing that is. As I sit, well stand with one eye penning this and the other on my daughter, I have to say how thankful I am to God for such a beautiful blessing He has bestowed upon me and my husband. Everything I thought about parenting including all the judgement of other moms I completely throw away and ask for forgiveness for thinking how ‘is this so hard as they say’! It is hard, tiring, overwhelming, full of tears and sleepless nights. But when I see Faith’s bright eyes staring back at me or hear her cooing in her sleep like she is doing now, I realize that this second job I was given is worth it. I would be telling the untruth if I said I don’t miss my get-up-and-go days, which now consists of get-up-and-pack-her- extra clothes, car seats, breast pump (ANOTHER STORY), milk, and yes, the baby. No one said this would be easy. Not one single person in my life said it would be easy. I have yet to find what works for me as I am still learning this little girl. I’ve learned her ‘feed me now’ cries and ‘I’m sleepy’ cries but as she gets use to this new world and learn to make waves each day, so will daddy and I continue learning with her….and for the record, I’m not rushing this learning process. Sometimes I feel like parenting in today’s society is such a huge race and competition. There is always this chat among moms “oh my child did this at that age’ or ‘your baby’s not doing that yet’. As for me, I’m going to keep crying while still enjoying the moments. No one said it would be easy. And my tears are tears of “Lord am I doing this right?” “Am I nurturing her like you would have me to?”
You know God is so funny. I know He is laughing at me like, Tamika, didn’t I tell you to do what I said do. I had to learn to tune everyone out. Advice from people can be overwhelming and I’m not able to hide me feelings off my face. I will tell you what I have learned is that every baby is different so no matter what this woman’s baby did or is doing, your experience will be different. I’ve learned that I have to continue to listen to God and trust Him in everything, and I mean everything. He laughs at me and wipes those tears from my eyes. This parenting process is a wonderful experience. I just keep reminding myself that I’m not expected to be the perfect mom and this road of parenting is not easy. At the same token I’m also reminded that all the tools I need God will give to me. And every day He continues to supply all the tools I need to be successful. Now I’m just trying to figure out how to balance it all…but that’s another day of writing. When you seem like every day is a rush of parenting, working, wife-ing, balancing (or unbalancing), friending, caring, and everything else you do, you may sometimes begin to to feel overwhelmed, tired, and restless. Remember, to cast your cares on Him (I Peter 5:7). Your tears, your fears, your doubts, your anger, your restless and weary days too for the bible says He cares for you and when you care for someone, you do your best to take care of them. That’s the awesome God we serve! He doesn’t want us to compete with each other. He doesn’t want us to think we can do it all by ourselves. He wants us to depend on Him. Totally. With our wholeheart. Trust me, its worth to give it all to Him!
Be inspired & remember its a faith journey y’all!