4 Habits to Kick as We Get Closer to 2019

Let’s admit it girls. We all have habits that we need to get rid of before we toast cheers to 2019.  Carrying bad habits create unnecessary weights that can ultimately kill us our journey.  When we continue to allow negative habits to plague our lives, slowly but surely the light at the end of the tunnel will become dim.


Your ability to bounce back

is a testimony for your comeback!


Remember your why.  I’m in the process of planning a new venture, which is why I have not been busy with One Faith Journey.  Please forgive me.  (This is my confession girls) I’m having to make sure that I plan out my days, weeks, and the entire month ahead, including how I engage with you.  There are times where we may fall off the wagon a bit or even a few times due to busyness, family changes, work changes but always remember to find ways to bounce back. Your ability to bounce back is a testimony for your comeback!


As we coast into the 4th quarter of the year, ready to make that touch down, let’s commit to get rid of some habits that can and will hold us back from making the best of 2019.  We cannot, I repeat, we cannot take bad habits into 2019.  You are guaranteed to fail if you don’t kick these habits out the door.

  1. The Need to Please– We’ve all been bit by this bug and for some people this is not an issue.  BUT for those of us that have the bite mark still on us I want to encourage you to quit worrying about what others think.  Quit trying to appease to others.  What others think and want from you does not matter in terms of success.  Now don’t get me wrong, you have people in your tribe who want the best for you. They matter.  But for the naysayers, the questioners, the people who feel they have all the answers.  Bye Bye! You have to determine within yourself that no matter where you are on your journey, other people cannot and will not determine your level of joy.
  2. Stop Procrastination– Raise your hand if  you struggle with this! Me! Burning the midnight oil produces my best work.  For real ladies, it does.  But in reality the procrastination bug creates a sense of unnecessary rush and it takes away from my ability to rest.  My mind starts racing with all the words, work, thoughts, ideas trying to put pieces together as I get closer to the deadline.  When you have a deadline to complete a task, allow yourself some time daily to work towards the deadline.  You’ll walk away feeling more confident and accomplished in your work.
  3. Delaying Actions– The bible tells us to write the vision.  So many times we have written out our vision, given it to God and yet, we are afraid to move forward with our actions.  This fear comes because we want to know the outcome.  In this 4th quarter God wants to put our faith to work.  Pray away that fear and put your trust in Him.  There is no way for us to know the outcome for everything unless He shows us.  Your faith will become stronger if you only trust Him.  Your vision will come pass if you only trust Him.  The best thing you can do right now in this 4th quarter is take your leap of faith (and as I’m typing this, I’m speaking to myself).  When God gives you the vision, put your faith to work and watch God work!
  4. Taking on Too Much– I have to keep talking about this because I hear people say how tired they are or how much they are overwhelmed.  I want to encourage you to stop doing the work for people, stop overcommiting yourself, and stop saying yes to things that may take you away from your God-given tasks, tasks that will bring Him glory.  For example, I had to press pause on some tasks at church.  But it’s the work of the Lord, Tamika.  You’re right.  However, my first ministry is at home and when things became overwhelming in all that I was doing in church ministry, home became a second priority and that is not how God calls us to lead as mothers, wives, friends, etc. Take heed to the voice of God and allow Him to direct your path so that you know where your “Yes Lord” answers need to go.  For some it may be comforting a friend in need. For others it may be turning down a girls night out to minister to the homeless.  You may be a wife, daughter, leader, church facilitator or whatever.  When God can get the glory out of all we do, we are giving our best Yes.

Will you join me during this 4th quarter to kick these habits out the window? Will you join in me surrendering our fears, our procrastination, our busy schedules and our need to please over to God?

Here is a simple prayer to get us started on our journey toward a successful 4th quarter:

Lord we come boldly before your throne thanking you for your continuous grace and mercy for it is by your grace that we have not been consumed.  You gave us visions for our homes, our families, our businesses, our jobs, our marriages, and our lives because you know the plans you have for us.  Lord we surrender our fears, our need to please, our procrastination habits, and any other habit that may  hinder us we wrap up the year.  We trust that you will continue to be a lamp unto our feet and guide our paths so that we can give our best yes to your will because you deserve all of the glory.

In Jesus Name,

Amen

It’s a faith journey y’all.  We have to be pray for consistency in all facets of our lives so that we can get this touch down into 2019! Feel free to comment on how I can pray with you for a successful year end for your family, your life, your leadership, your business or any area in your life.

Blessings!

Tamika W.

P.S. I’m releasing some goodies this month.  Podcast coming this week & the weekly planner is ready to send next week.  If you are a subscriber, you’ll be the first to get a copy.  If you’re not subscribing do so today.

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Goals for the Gold

#workitgirl

Today I was thinking about my goal-setting habits and realized that I need to refine this habit to be more productive and efficient for my short and long-term goals.  As I was thinking about goal-setting (or my lack thereof lately), I thought about the Olympics.  As much as I love sports, I’m not a fan of the Olympics but this past winter, I was intrigued by the 2018 Winter Olympics for some reason.  You would not believe which sport I watched and kept track of? Definitely not skiing. Bobsledding or as said in the olympic world ‘bobsleigh’.  I’m not sure why I was interested but I tuned in during my morning breaks to catch up or watch live.  I learned so many interesting facts about the sport:

  1. The first push of acceleration is very important.
  2. The pilot and brakeman have to be in sync with one another with timely jumps into the sled.
  3. Flexibility is key as you fit two bodies into a tiny sled. Some on their heels while the driver sits.
  4. Friction can slow you down and cause you to lose the race by hundredths of a second.
  5. The pilot sees everything.  One pilots said he never tells his teammates about what’s ahead and tells them it was a good trip.
  6. Physics plays a huge part in bobsledding. Sledders have to be very careful of their moves to avoid crashing.

So how does this relate to setting goals Tamika? Simple.

1. Pushing yourself to get started on your goals is very important.  The first push propels you; it gets your started.

2. Timeliness is important.  There is nothing like setting a goal to get something completed in a week and you haven’t considered your family, your work schedule, or other things you are working on as well.  Make sure you set realistic goals while considering other tasks on your schedule.

3. When hammering out your plan, be flexible.  If you set out to read daily for 30 minutes and something comes up, find ways to squeeze some time in or spread the extra minutes throughout the week.

4.  What are some things that bring hindrance to your life? Consider the “friction” and find ways to avoid it so that you don’t lose sight of your goal.

5.  This is my favorite one. Who is the pilot in your life? In bobsledding the pilot plays a huge role in the success of the team.  My pilot is God.  He sees everything that lies ahead of us.  He guides our path and gives us what we need to be successful.

6. You have the power to put things in motion.  Just put little force behind it, some motivation that is. We are already in August.  The third quarter of the year is coming to a close soon folks.  What declarations did you make over your life?  What daily affirmations are you telling yourself to push you closer to your dreams?  What goals do you need to set in order to end 2018 with shouting bang?

I know we live in an virtual, online world.  Shopping, chatting, connecting with people are all at our finger tips.  HOWEVER…. There is something about the power of writing.  The formation of the letters as you write.  Write out your goals. The pen, the paper and your brain will connect when you do this.  It’s powerful y’all!

In order to live your best life, you have to stop wishing and start working so take your first step toward your destiny.  Write your goals to win the gold!

Need help with goals for your marriage?  Check out our latest podcast Faith & Marriage: Making Time for Spouse & Self Episode 5.

Need a reality check about your progress? Check out Progress Ain’t Pretty.

Ready to celebrate some successes big or small? Read this post for some ideas/inspiration Celebration Time 4 You! 

Remember, it’s a faith journey y’all!

Blessings, blessings, and more blessings to you!

Tamika W.

5 Steps to Finding Your Why

I love this topic of finding our ‘why’ or our purpose!  Why? Because everyone has a purpose.  It has been destined before the beginning of time.  We all have a reason that is often bigger than what we think or believe about ourselves.

If you’re feeling a little stuck in figuring out the purpose of your idea or finding your purpose at all, check out these few steps to help you along the way.  And if you’re feeling stuck, you can listen to Episode 3: I’m Stuck for some encouragement.

Because we serve an awesome God, remember, you are destined for greatness!

4 Steps to Finding Your WHY-1

 

Every Mom Longs for Peace

Have you seen the commercial where the mom packs up everything, walks out the door and forgets the kids? I love that commercial because it speaks to the everyday mom. I know our days can be rushed, frazzled, and not enough time to do all that we have to do. We spend so much time making sure the bills are paid, the clothes are folded, the snacks are packed, the children feel loved, the team feels appreciated that we often forget about us. Our plates are indeed full. If you haven’t read that post, I suggest you go back and read it. Click here >>>>> Your Plate is FULL. Please Tell Them No.

As the week comes to a close, I want to remind the busy moms to chill for a bit.  Unrush your life, honor your time, and enjoy you. Now some of these may sting a little bit but I want you to envision some peace in your life. Kind of hard I know. After all, what would your household be without you. We live zombie, chaotic lives with little sleep, brooms in one arm, keys in our mouth, work bags around our necks, hubbies holding our hand, and little ones tugging at our hearts for attention.

Seriously, to be our best, we have to invite some peaceful times in our life or else our best self will be a complete mess. Doing these things will give you time to meditate, get clarity, and chat with God. The word of God tells us to cast our cares on Him and the peace of God will guard your heart and minds in Christ.  I know this to be true.  I’m sure you do too.  When we spend some time in His peace, we rest in knowing that all else will be cared for by our Heavenly father.  Be sure to take these steps and honor some time for yourself.

Remember, it’s a faith journey y’all.  No matter where you are in the hustle of life you must faith!

honoring mommy time

Progress Ain’t Pretty

faith matters

****Originally posted June 16, 2018 on http://www.mzimperfect.com as a guest post****

Recently a friend of mine started a bathroom renovation project. She showed us pictures of the bathroom before, during and after. On the first day of renovation, she knew that things would look a little messy but when she sent the picture to her girls, they were expecting something different. Every day she checked on the progress. Some days it looked fine and others it looked messy. But, there was some progress.

I am not sure who told me that taking on your dreams would be easy. That I would not be exhausted some days. That my patience would fluctuate. That my confidence would be tested. When chasing your dreams-an idea, a book deal, a business venture, a new career-you can organize your days, take a thousand courses, meet with expert after expert, but in order to succeed, you have to understand that your ability to bounce back will help you in the long run.

According to CNN Money, more than 44 million people have a dream (side hustle is their term) they are working. Even with all of the experts in your dream field, you’re going to get overwhelmed by the many one-size-fits-all dream routes. You will encounter naysayers. You will find that some days you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. Through it all, what are you expected to do? Push through it with courage and faith despite how tough it gets.

Having courage and faith is connected to your bounce back down the road. No matter what valley you may experience, trust me, there are resources and tools to help. I call those tools faith strengthening and conditioning because when you keep hammering your way through, your faith becomes stronger.

You condition your mind, body, and soul to do the impossible. With faith strengthening and conditioning you begin to position yourself as if it already exists. So where can you find these tools, you may ask. It’s really simple. Nothing you have to purchase. No video to watch. No list to subscribe to at this time. Real. Simple.

  1. Share your story. Your ability to climb the mountain to reach your dreams has a powerful story connected to it. Create a safe space for others to learn about your progress. Share the ups and downs, the highs and lows. People will tune in because you keep it real and because you are living proof.
  2. Celebrate the small successes. Often we look for big results and forget about the little steps along the journey that helped us reach the dream. Without those small steps, you may not have made it to the big achievement. Remember, success comes in all shapes, sizes and forms.
  3. Be open to change. Every day on your journey will not look the same. Your routines may change. Your circle of influence may change. Your dreams may even change. The best thing you can do prepare for the change by focusing your time and energy where you can have an impact.
  4. Highlight what works best for you. Refrain from always focusing on what is not working. Of course you’ll have to put what’s not working into perspective but the problem comes in when we constantly focus on the negative. Think about what is working for you and WHY it is working. Sometimes this will give us insight on our journey and believe me, it will help you push through the muddy days as well.
  5. Self-care is the best care. When you feel sick, take a break. When you are overwhelmed, press pause. Many times we can’t climb the mountain toward our dreams because we are physically and mentally worn out. There is only one you and you have to take care of yourself. Don’t be pressured to burn the midnight oil with a sore throat or with heavy eyes. How effective will you be with no sleep or if you can’t talk?

When you experience a low point, know that you have to bounce back. The bible tells us that God will bless us with the desires of heart but we are to not become weary in doing good. You can’t give up. You can’t rest too long in the valley. Chasing your dreams is complicated. You will experience burn out. The progress on your journey ain’t pretty but if you try those simple tools mentioned and keep sprinkling your life with faith, you will bounce back in time to enjoy the journey.

Remember, it’s a faith journey y’all!

Tamika W.


Celebration Time 4 You!

You ladies know I’m always preaching about stop being busy. Work on your schedule. Learn how to say no.  Even in the midst of scheduling, working, being a wife and a mom, I’m learning to take some time to celebrate Tamika.  We all have duties that we must take care of, duties that are important, duties that you are called to do.  However, even after all the duties, we some times (most times) find ourselves operating on 5 hours of sleep, little social time for friends, and giving so much time helping others.  Don’t get me wrong I enjoy my duties but I also need some me time.

When you find yourself feeling a little empty on “you time” remember self-care is important.  I think I’m going to start calling it “Celebration Time” instead of self-care because I want to be as free as I can.  To celebrate, I’m stepping out of my box to do some enjoyable things.  I’m going to try a few of these & you should too!

Enjoy!

Tamika W.

4 Ways to Celebrate You!

3 Things That Happen When We Say No

overwhelmedschedule.png

Day Three Reflection: Lessons Learned When We Slow Down

Yesterday I was supposed to meet my cousin to give her some items as she prepares for a new baby.  Our meeting was supposed to be 1 PM.  In the midst of rushing out the door, having to go back home twice, running late for her doctor’s appointment, she didn’t notice the air pressure on her tires.  She hopped in the car with three little girls and in a flash, on a busy interstate, her car spun around and landed in a ditch.  The two back tires were blown completely. Thank God she, expected baby, and the three little girls are doing just fine.

I wasn’t going to post my reflection today but as I thought about The Best Yes studies and my reflection I’ve been doing in my own life, this scenario connected immediately to my studies.  Now for the record, I’m not saying my cousin did anything wrong.  For me, I connected the scenario to my lessons learned.

Here is what I learned when we slow down:

  1.  Life is a lot less discombobulated. You gain clarity on some things. Let’s face it, when you’re busy lots of things happen that you sometimes don’t realize.  You eat out so much.  You forgot it was your day to pick up the kids.  You were late to the leadership meeting at church.  The baseball game tickets were for last weeks game. Your oil needed changing a month ago.  Your tires are worn out. You get it, right.   When life is foggy, it’s really hard to see what’s ahead.  When life is clearer, you notice important things.  You notice things that matter.
  2. You can tune into God’s voice.  When you’re so busy, you are not giving God enough time for Him to really speak to you.  At least I give Him some time, you may say to yourself.  That’s true.  I get it.  Our relationship with God is constantly being fine tuned.  I often think about a group of ladies that are best friends.  It all started with a simple walk in the morning, waving hello.  A few weeks later, those hello’s became 5 minute chats.  Then the 5 minute chats grew to coffee after the walks.  From there it grew to Friday night game nights.  The relationship continued to grow until now this group of ladies are bonded with a friendship like no other.  Christ wants us to grow with Him in the same manner.  When you unrush life, you give yourself more opportunities to tune in to God’s voice and spend some quality time with Him.
  3. Emphasis is placed on aspects of life that are important.  The juggling act disappears.  How you spend your time is dictated by the schedule you set.  Slowing down gives you control to determine what aspects of your life are important enough for you to schedule.  Slowing down gives you the freedom to say no.

“When a woman lives with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule, she’ll ache with the sadness of an underwhelmed soul.”

From Chapter 3 of The Best Yes

Bonus Tip:  Are you the people pleasing type of person?  Do you feel that you may hurt someone’s feelings if you say no?  Do you overcommit your schedule?  I too struggled with this area in my life.  I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.  I wanted everyone to be pleased.  And I put too many things on my calendar.  At one point in recent months I found myself overwhelmed, stressed out, and getting frustrated.  My emotions were all over the place with my family and I didn’t want to be bothered.  I had so much to do and so little time.  I took a step back and realized I was doing someone else’s job for them.  The assignment was not for me but I committed to it.  While the other individual was enjoying time hanging with family and friends, here I was doing tasks that should have been done by someone else.  Ever find yourself in that position?  Yeah, it sucks! There was something I could do and I did just that-stopped doing tasks that were not my assignment. #lessonlearned for the upteenth time.  LOL

I learned that I cannot be everything for everyone and to everyone.  I had to learn to say no.  When we give in to spare others we find ourselves overwhelmed, stressed, and frustrated.  There are times when you will say YES and enjoy it but I want to encourage you to look at every situation with an eye of wisdom and be confident in your yes and no.

I pray that you were able to gain some wisdom and encouragement from my Best Yes reflections.  If you have not read the book, be sure to add it to your reading list for 2018.  The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst (watch this video) is worth the read (the companion workbook is too).  Thanks for taking this reflection journey with me as we learned to give our Best Yes!

I’ve been looking at a few bible study online topics to start an online bible study for Fall 2018.  What topics are you interested in studying to dig deep in God’s word?  Be sure to comment, like, and share!

Remember, it’s a faith journey y’all!

Tamika W.

 

P.S.  I’ll be releasing the podcast schedule for the summer.  It’s LIT! Did I use that right?  Any way…stay tuned for the release schedule later this week.  We are adding some cool features to our podcast that involves you!